Why I Play

October 5, 2011

It’s been a rough week. A few days ago, my wife found out that she matched for her neonatology fellowship in St. Louis, MO. She’s excited, because she really likes the program and it’s a great opportunity. Unfortunately, St. Louis isn’t the ideal city for us. I’m fairly certain that emergency medicine is what I want to do with the rest of my life, and there are no osteopathic (D.O.) emergency medicine residencies in Missouri. There are a couple allopathic (M.D.) programs, but I would need to do a traditional rotating internship (TRI) year first to strengthen my application. There is one TRI program in St. Louis, but it’s a risky proposition for a number of reasons that I won’t get into here. Suffice it to say, I’ve been feeling very helpless. It seems like no matter what I do, or how much I want to succeed, whatever happens ultimately isn’t even up to me or Emily. It’s very unsettling.

******

People often ask me why I play so many video games. Granted, I used to play much more than I do now, but I still turn on my DS or PSP for at least a few minutes each night before I go to sleep. Growing up, I used video games as my escape. If life was getting stressful or if I just wanted to procrastinate for a little while, I’d pop in a Zelda game and suddenly be a million miles away in Hyrule, swinging a sword or playing an ocarina.

But video games are more than escapism. During the most tumultuous times of my life, video games have been therapy. When I feel like I have no control over the things that matter most, video games offer a place where I can feel helpful. Useful. Needed. I’m saving a princess from captivity, a species from annihilation, or world from destruction. The helplessness I felt before is gone and I feel empowered to do something good. Even if that good is for fictional characters, it resonates. When I’m done playing, the feeling of empowerment stays, even if only for a week. A few days. A moment. It builds confidence. It battles depression. It inspires.

Sony just launched a new ad campaign called LongLivePlay. The video below sums up the feeling I’ve tried to convey here. It’s more effective if you’re familiar with the characters, but it gets the point across either way.


4th Year: COMLEX Step 2 Done!

August 15, 2011

When you finally finish the first two years of medical school, people tell you that the second two aren’t nearly as hard. For the most part, that’s true. You don’t spend every single night studying, being out on rotations is infinitely more interesting than sitting in a lecture hall all day, and your social life picks back up a bit. But during my third year, I still felt like the majority of my time was spent studying for shelf exams or worrying about scheduling my next set of rotations.

Now that I’m well into my fourth year, things seem to be calming down a bit. I took Step 2 of the COMLEX earlier this week (and wrote about it here, on Match Game). All in all, it could have gone worse. I felt decently prepared, and after my brain recovered from the mush it turned into during the exam, I was able to really start enjoying my emergency medicine rotation. It’s not the career for me, because I like having the patient continuity that comes with something like pediatrics or family medicine, but it’s always interesting. Each patient you see is completely different than the last. And now that most of my studying is done (I still have to take COMLEX Step 2 PE in January), I can start working on my residency applications that I’ve been putting off.

Currently Playing
PlayStation 3: Mortal Kombat
Xbox 360: Bastion
3DS: Final Fantasy Tactics A2: Grimoire of the Rift
PSP: Final Fantasy IV Complete Collection
iPod: 7 Simple Words


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.